South Africa's Bogus New Combat Aircraft

South Africa unveiled today its new combat airplane, the Ahrlac. They call it a drone, an attack helicopter and a surveillance aircraft all in one. I call it a piece of crap. I've seen one of these before, it's called an ultralight. The plane boasts, well, pretty much nothing. It has a propeller and I see a couple of little bombs and rockets under the wings.

Want to hear the kicker? This thing is going to cost one third to one half the price of an American Apache attack copter. Apaches cost $20 million, by the way. So this little nuisance could cost the South Africans up to $10 million each. I found a nice used ultralight for sale online for $9,500. Here's an idea for you South Africa, just buy a few of those and stick a little bomb or two under it.

Rep. Waxman is a Naked Mole Rat

Sept. 27 Market Recap

Today the rumormill crapshow continued. The market driver was a rumor that a Greek solution was on the way, including an expansion of the EFSF bailout fund. I've only heard that one about 100 times now and I'm not falling for it again. Confirmation of the baseless 300 point Dow rally came later in the day when an article from FT illustrated a division amongst the EU members, with as many as seven nations calling for more Greek debt write downs in the private sector. By the end of the day the market gave up most of its gains and is poised to open lower tomorrow. Reminder: do not even try to trade this market, you will get burned.

Sept. 26 Market Recap

Remember how the stock market is a load of steaming crap the past month or two? If you haven't been keeping up to date, all you really need to know is the European Union is trying to come up with a solution to bail out Greece while also appeasing all of the EU member nations. The problem is every reporter on the planet is trying to find any hint of what is going to happen and as a result we are getting bombarded with rumors that all end up being denied shortly after. The end result is a Dow Jones index that makes 800 point swings higher, and then back down, in less than two weeks. If you're trying to invest in this market and you're not a headline-reading high frequency trading bot you really have no chance.

Today, the rumor was that the EU has come up with a plan that involves Greek debt holders taking a 50% haircut on their holdings, along with trillion euro expansion of the European bailout fund. Not a chance in hell I'm falling for this one again. Anyone that has tried to trade on rumors just like this in the last month have been given a Floyd Mayweather-esque sucker punch. If you were really paying close attention, you would've noticed German Finance Minister Schaeuble denying any fund expansion plans. And let's face it, Germany is running the show here. Apologies to all who tried to jump in on what is most likely to be another devastating market headfake.

Sly Stone Lives in a Van?!

Ladies and gentlemen, that van you see pictured on the left is indeed the current residence of Mr. Sly Stone. All I really have to say about that is this hurts me, right in the heart. Sly, frickin', Stone. The grandaddy of funk has fallen to this. I probably don't have to tell you either that its drugs. Drugs did it. Come to think of it, I remember watching the Grammy's a few years back when they tried to bring Sly out on stage and it just didn't turn out well. All Sly could manage was to mumble and stagger around a little bit. I really don't care though because I love Sly. For God's sake, somebody give this guy some money.

New Home Sales: Reason #6,597 We're All Screwed

New Home sales came in at an annual rate of 295k in August. That's 2.3% below July, and just modestly above the 281k record low set in February. A crushing blow for anyone hoping to work in construction anytime soon, but then again how can you blame anyone for not wanting to buy a new home in August, when the Dow Jones was screaming bloody murder and the European Union was on the brink of epic failure (on that note, the EU is still teetering on a calamitous destruction). Not the kind of backdrop that makes you want to shell out your life savings on a falling knife, is it?

But for anyone following the housing market lately, this comes as no surprise and in fact the consensus estimate compiled by Bloomberg was looking for approximately the same result. Then again, the Census Bureau put a +/- 13.9% margin of error on its new home findings, so if you wanted to you could also just completely throw out the result altogether because the Census doesn't know its neck from its asshole. Your choice, but I think you would be making a grave mistake if you didn't think housing was utterly lifeless right now.